I’m doing it wrong!

So, in order to fulfill my destiny as the Next Great Novelist, I’m reading all sort of posts here on WordPress (and elsewhere) about writing and publishing.  That’s because I’m the Next Great Novelist, but certainly not the first one.  And apparently, I’m doing it all wrong.

I rather naively think that the First Novel will just flow smoothly from a vague concept to a great novel.  One edit will be enough to fix the very few spelling errors.  The first agent I contact will fall all over himself, eager to get me into print.  Publishing houses will beat a path to my door and throw money at me.  A major Hollywood studio will send a private jet and put me up for six months, all expenses paid, while we film the blockbuster movie with top name stars.

And then I read all these stories about *real* writers who write novel after novel.  Their stuff is elegant, polished, and professional.  They do character studies, write outlines, make summaries, plot story arcs, put stickies on whiteboards… and they’ve got years of rejection letters stuffed in their file cabinets.  Who the fuck am *I* to think I will write one stupid neophyte novel and suddenly be rich and famous?

Well, I don’t care.  I’m going to write the First Novel they way I want to write it.  I don’t care if it sucks.  I don’t care if I’m not doing it right.  I just feel like writing and I want to write my story.  Once I get it finished, I *will* make a good effort at getting it published, and maybe do the right steps so that I too can fill a drawer full of rejection letters.  But for now, I’m just writing my story and I will not let myself worry about the rest of the process.

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